Feeling Plump

Thursday and Friday were fine. I went to a thousand meetings and discovered that I look preggers enough so that my friend Paula felt comfortable enough to ask me if I am knocked up without fear of me saying "NO! I just got FAT!" Another friend, Gwen, who's been gone all summer, said "I barely recognised you with your hair down and, you know, you're obviously" [insert pregnant-belly hand gesture here]. By Friday afternoon other people knew too, because Tom started spilling the beans. And Paula and Gwen too, probably.

So, I look obviously pregnant. Which is funny, because at only 12 weeks-ish, I shouldn't look preggers! Wiggly is only 2 inches long! But what people are seeing, really, is the weight gain. I've gained about 12 lbs this summer. Apparently the people who remember what I looked like before the summer decide right away that I must be pregnant. Which is true, but it's still funny because it's not really the baby they're seeing...they are, in fact, just SEEING ME GET FAT and PRESUMING it's related to a baby. Thank goodness for all of us that they're right, because otherwise a lot of people would have been quite embarrassed! Including me.

And now for something completely different.

My latest concern is waxing and/or shaving. I can still reach my legs, obviously, but there will come a time when it will be difficult. Also, I have to have exams every month and I imagine it will only get harder to keep the crotch area groomed. Maybe it's dumb, but I don't want to look like a porn star from the 70s when I go to see my doctors. You know? And although I've gone for professional waxes before, I'm not sure I'm comfortable doing so once I'm largely pregnant. I don't know. My giant pregnant belly, I think, will be something I want to keep to myself. Those girls have to get kind of intimate with you to bikini wax you, and I'm not sure I will want to allow that once hugely pregnant.

I thought I'd find a message board thread on the subject. I thought that what other pregnant women have done/thought would help me come to some solutions. Instead, what I found were message board threads dealing with waxing/shaving STOMACHS. Apparently, some women grow thick treasure trails while pregnant, and they don't like to shave them because they and their husbands and children tend to touch their bare bellies, and the women are embarassed from the STUBBLE. They have trouble waxing it theirselves because the hairs grow pointing in different directions, plus it hurts their tender bellies.

WTF? Am I going to grow a manly treasure trail and have to shave my stomach? I was worried about legs and crotch, and now I have to add STOMACH to the list? The things I never realized I'd have to think about.